Today's rambling: To-Do List
Written on Friday, Mar. 28, 2003 at 12:40 p.m.
while feeling a bit

Here's my To-Do List for today:

1. Meet with my advisor to discuss my schedule.
2. Read the required pages for French class.
3. Change clothes and go to scholarship interview.
4. Hang out with Kevin for awhile this afternoon (don't want him to feel left out!).
5. Get down to the Phi Sig house with Amanda to turn in our bids.
6. Eat 'n Park with the sisters later tonight!

So there you go. It's going to be one big mountain of fun from this point onward. The thing I'm worrying about most is the scholarship interview. I mean, it's just a measly little amount of money, but it's still an interview and I'm all freaked out about it! I never rehearsed anything that I'll say, but then again I've never done that for any of the interviews I've had. I'm entirely too idealistic. To me, I think it would be more appreciated if the person came in completely honest and whatnot. I mean, on the one hand I wouldn't want to sit there listening to a bunch of "Uh, um, well"s, but at the same time I wouldn't want someone to come in with this fully-rehearsed script of trite drivel. 'Course, I think the only real questions they're going to ask are "How long did you do this," and blah blah, but they're probably going to ask "Why do you think you deserve this scholarship more than the other applicants?" At least, Kristen was asked that question when she went to her interview for a different scholarship...

I hate those kinds of questions. It's like the trivial "Why do you think YOU'RE Britney Spears's Number 1 Fan?" questions. How do you respond to that? Mine has always been that I'm NOT any more of a fan than anyone else. I mean, everyone thinks that they're the biggest fan, but you can't really MEASURE something like that. And it's the same for why I think I deserve a scholarship more than anyone else. Obviously, we're all there because of financial need, so there goes THAT reason. The only real response I would have to that question is that I'm not here JUST so I can get a degree and get out into the world. Half these freshmen just came out of high school, and they're still in the mindset of "Augh, just get me out of this place so I never have to go to school again!" If I'd come here right after high school, I know I would have been itching to get out as soon as possible. Just get it over with! But I waited, and I've come back because I want to learn and do things. It's not that I've never sat here and thought, "3 more years after this...ugh!" but I don't feel that way as often as, say, an 18-year old freshman would.

So that'll be my response...assuming they ask it. My other big stressor is that I'm probably going to know at least one of the people interviewing me...assuming there IS more than one person (and I'm sure there will be). I know it doesn't make sense: shouldn't I be more comfortable with that knowledge, because at least I'll know the person? But I've always been more comfortable getting up and saying things around people that I don't know, because I can't guess their thoughts and reactions, and likewise they don't have any real insight into my character either. I think my advisor is one of the folks doing the interviewing, and I really don't want him there thinking, "Well that's not true" or something like that! I'd rather it just be a bunch of professors that I don't know (minus my former advisor), so that way I'd be a little more at ease. But oh well, I'll get through it. I shouldn't let a little thing like this bother me anyway.

The NYC day trip is tomorrow, so I'll be Kristen-less from about 4 o'clock tomorrow morning until about 6:30-ish on Sunday morning! And then she'll be sleeping for ages after that (hopefully), so I'll be able to sleep in at least! That's what I'm hoping, anyway. But regardless, I'll still have tomorrow all to myself and that is perfectly awesome. I did get along with her much better last night, thankfully ('course, part of the night was spent hanging out downstairs with some of the sisters), but I'd still like to have some time to myself. Though I suspect I'll be out with my friends anyway. :-P

This whole sorority thing, as of right now, is such a neat thing. Last night at Gemmell, Amanda and I were getting our drinks and one of the sisters saw us and was like, "Hey, how's it going" and all this other stuff...It's the same feeling I always get whenever someone I've only just met recognizes me and strikes up a conversation, hehe! I think I have an inferiority complex, where I feel like I'm not really important enough to remember after only one or two brief meetings, but she remembered me! And today I've seen a few people (one of them is another pledge) who were like, "I heard you signed! Congratulations!" So it was just a warm, fuzzy sort of feeling. ^_^ After Erin and Denise's initiation tonight, they're all going to Eat 'n Park and they invited Amanda and I to go along! Woot! No Chandler food for me tonight! LOL...well, I'll probably go anyway just because I have no idea when they'll be going out. :P But yeah, it's just nice to be invited!

Okay, it's after 12:30 and that's when I'd planned to go down and see my advisor, so I'd better hasten off now! Hasten...who ever uses THAT word anymore...?