Today's rambling: Un malentendu
Written on Saturday, Feb. 22, 2003 at 7:26 p.m.
while feeling a bit

I went down to Lauren and Amanda's room yesterday, and Amanda was telling me about how Kevin had come down earlier and just fell asleep in their room. When I walked in, he was still sleeping. Under any other circumstance I would've been like, "Awww," but yesterday I just kinda grimaced at him and sat down on Lauren's chair. When he woke up, I didn't talk to him or look at him (hehe...I was contemplating how to treat him), but I could feel him looking at me. Finally he was like, "Hello Amber!" so I glanced over at him and gave a subdued 'hello' back.

"I didn't mean to ditch you guys last night," he said, and proceeded to explain what had happened. That girl he'd sat with had apparently had some kinda big problem, and even Lauren (who knows her really well) says that she babbles on and on, so he got stuck there with her.

"Alright," I said finally, "you're spared my 'You're getting a really big head and if you don't quit acting like a jerk I'll disassociate myself from you' speech." Amanda looked over at me with this "Oh my gosh, I can't believe you just said that but it was great!" expression, and Kevin insisted that he doesn't have a big head. :P But thankfully things are all back to normal on that front.

I'm glad that, even though things were resolved, I was still able to say that to him. Even though he doesn't think his personality was changing at all, I was seeing it and I didn't like it. So now, hopefully, he'll be able to look at some of the things he says and does and think, "Am I being a little condescending here?" I told him that the reason I hadn't wanted to say anything before was because I knew it would all blow over, and I didn't want to spoil his happiness over being in this play, so at least he knows I wasn't trying to be malicious and snarky toward him.

Amanda had to work at the Rec Center from 9-11, so I worked out on the elliptical machine (it was EMPTY up in that section) and then went down to the weight room. I am really starting to love working out! I mean sure, the elliptical machine kills me, and I get all sweaty, but I feel so GREAT afterward! And going down to the weight room, even when there are big buff guys there...It just makes me feel good to know that I'm making myself healthier. 'Course, my arm muscles are hurting like a bizzatch right now, but that's okay! I didn't fully realize until last night exactly HOW weak my arms are. Amanda told me to get on this pull-up machine that even aids you in doing them...yet even with the thing on its easiest setting, I couldn't pull myself up at all! It was an ego crusher.

If anyone knows a machine I could use to strengthen those particular muscles needed to do a pull-up, I would greatly appreciate it. My goal is to someday be able to do ONE. Just one, that's all I need. I was never able to do anything more than hang on the bar back in school, so this would be like proving to myself that I'm not a big weakling. ;)

Kevin's parents came up today to watch the play. I've never met his parents before, but he's told them all about how I'm his big sister so I want to meet them! He and Lauren both really want me to come down tonight, so I think I'll wander down around 10 o'clock to see them. After leaving Amanda's room last night/this morning around 2:30, we stood up in the stairwell talking until 4 am! It was so nice being able to talk to him again. And it's so easy to be able to just sit there and talk for hours on end with him, which is something I've never really had with many friends before. Are guys supposed to be such good conversationalists? ;) Ha ha ha, just kidding!

Anyway, I'm going to close up this entry now because Lola AND Jam are on, so I should stop neglecting them. :P

Later note: Met Kevin's parental units, and his mother seems every bit as sweet as he's always making her out to be. Of course, neither of them were terribly interested in talking to Lauren or I because they were too excited over having seen Kevin in the play, but that's alright. ;) Another point in Kevin's favor: when Josh came out he just kinda nodded at me and walked on to find his parents, but Kevin...Kevin saw me and immediately hastened over to say hello. And then he stayed there 'til he saw his parents...THEN came back and hung out until it was time to go back and get changed. Friends like him are fantastic, fantastic things.