Today's rambling: Not new. Different.
Written on Tuesday, Jan. 21, 2003 at 1:22 p.m.
while feeling a bit

HA!

Clarion's internet service hasn't been working for beans since we all came back on Sunday. I couldn't connect to AIM for more than 2 or 3 minutes at a time--and THAT was on the rare occasion that I actually connected at all! This morning, after coming back from History, nothing was working. Thus, I ripped out the ethernet cord and plugged in my phone cord. Hey, I'm paying $23-something a month for AOL; I might as well use it, right? I just hope this Local Access Number actually IS local, hehe! It said 'Clarion', so I can only assume it is. The only down sides are that A)I can't talk on the phone and be online at the same time, and B)I can't leave my connection on all day. But I think I can survive without the luxury of the latter, and I get phone calls too rarely to worry about the former.

History is going to be interesting, I hope. The professor is really nice and she's not focused on us memorizing dates, which is always a good thing. I hate having to memorize dates. Anyway, this class is supposed to focus more on the people and events, and how they helped America's transition or whatever. It should be interesting. And I've got Kevin, Lauren, and Amanda there as well!

Speaking of them...We had planned to meet at 8:45 or so for breakfast, but when Kristen and I showed up, I didn't see any of my friends. So I ended up sitting with this one girl (I don't know how she spells her name, so I'm not even going to bother, hehe). The others showed up maybe 10 or 15 minutes later, but they had Kevin's new roommate with them. I guess they've all gotten somewhat close with him, but there's something about him I don't like. Still, they won't exactly understand my reluctance to be around him if I don't hang out with him more than once... >_<

They were all going to squish in at the same table with me and A (I know her name starts with that, at least), but that kid (whose name is Josh) didn't want to sit there. I'm not sure if it's because there was so little room or because of the fact that A is handicapped...and let's face it, there ARE people out there who are like that, and I don't know him well enough yet to say whether he's that shallow. At any rate, he didn't even look over and say hi or anything as he passed to go to another table...and then of course Kevin was like, "Aww, I'm going to go sit with him." Then, after Lauren and Amanda finished their food, THEY went to sit with him, too.

I'd like to find out that he is a nice guy. I know a small part of my hesitance toward him is due to jealousy...I mean, last semester it was just the 4 of us...and even when Scarecrow Josh was around it wasn't all that different, because he wasn't a part of the group. But now we're including someone else, someone whose interests (from what I've seen thus far) are drastically different from mine. He was dressed sort of 'rapper style' the night I met him, with the button-up-the-leg windbreaker pants (whatever they're called) and some kinda jersey-ish thing. And he loves this one movie with Will Smith in it...what's it called, 'Bad' something. Basically one of those stupid movies where they say 'F- this, F- that' a lot. You know, the ones that have no plot and are basically made just to show off fancy cars and fighting 'prowess' and that sort of thing. This guy probably listens to rap, too...and would definitely not understand my interest in Oldies and Classic Rock.

And then there's my extreme discomfort with guys that are my age or younger. Well for that matter, girls around my age make me nervous. There are only an exceptional few who make me totally at ease, which is probably one of the reasons why I don't have a huge social circle. Kristen was teasing me the other day and saying that I need to find some new friends, and while I wouldn't want to get rid of those I have right now, I have to agree with her. I'm tired of sitting around and watching movies all the time! I'm not a movie person, and the movies that those guys like watching are ones that I'd rather NOT watch. Some are downright pathetic! So it would be nice to find another group of folks I could hang out with when I'm feeling like actually DOING something.

Heh! Speaking of finding new friends...well, they're not really NEW, but they're different from the group I usually hang with. It started with Pam knocking on my door and asking if I wanted to go eat lunch with her and her friends (since I now have Flex Dollars). So I went out into the hallway to wait for this one girl to get back, and then we went to the second floor to get some other girl. Now mind you, Pam is the only one out of the group that I actually like to hang out with. The other girls make me feel nervous and unwanted. So anyway, I ended up passing Jess's door so I knocked and asked if she wanted to go to lunch. Well, in the process of talking to her, all the OTHER girls just walked past me and left! I was like, "Well, I guess I'm not going with them..."

So I ended up going to lunch with Jess, her roommate Jackie, and their friend Teresa. They're a little different from the sort of people I'd usually like to hang out with, but it was okay. It was a nice change. I think I'd like to start hanging out with Miranda more. She's really cute. I'll have to talk to her during French today and see if she wants to do the library study idea. She's always at the library anyway, so I doubt she'll object.

I feel sick now. I wasn't hungry to begin with, so I probably should have skipped on lunch. Oh well, I'll live.

I thought I'd lost this entry because, without thinking, I shut down my computer. But when I came back, I discovered that this program hadn't been able to shut down, thereby keeping the entire machine from closing! Hee hee...lovely Notepad.

I should go now and start getting my French stuff together. I'm nervous about this class. Only met the professor once, and she seemed alright. But she's American, hehe, and I'm turning picky about who I want to teach me French. Learning from an American professor is all well and good when you're learning the elementary bits of the language, but by this point I'd really like to get myself fully immersed. But who knows; this class might end up being really challenging! :

Augh, I hope this feeling of being nauseated goes away! I don't want to upchuck during class, heh...