Today's rambling: Welcome to HELLLLL!!!
Written on Tuesday, Dec. 10, 2002 at 3:38 p.m.
while feeling a bit

Berry is very, very unhappy. Berry believes that today has turned out to be One Of The Worst Days She's Ever Had All Semester.

It all started when I couldn't find my ID card. I'd been so pleased with myself up 'til this point because I'd done such a good job at keeping track of my key and card, but today I could not find it. I tore my desk apart, checked my jeans pocket several times, checked my purse and schoolbag...it was nowhere. I have no idea what happened to it, and I had to pay $5 just to get a new one. The only bright part about that was that starting January 1, we have to pay $10. Insanity. Oh yeah, and I changed my meal plan so I can actually eat down at the snack bar instead of dealing with the dining hall all the time.

So anyway, to continue with the misery...remember that group presentation that we had to do for Message Design? Yeah, that sucked. It all boils down to that "too many cooks spoil the broth" clich�, and when some of your cooks don't even know HOW to cook...well, I think you get the general idea. We all met at the library last night to try and finalize everything. Aaron, the stupid MORON who rarely shows up for classes and then leaves 5 minutes into the ones he does show up for, didn't have all of his work done. Basically, what we'd all planned was to have our individual bits done for last night and then just run through our presentation until we were comfortable with it. So of course we were all irritated with him (moreso than usual), and he didn't understand why! X_X We decided to meet again today at the library one hour before class started, but we were so scattered today that we only got to run through the friggin' presentation ONCE...and it was wretched! Rick, who was the designated "MC", didn't even write out what he was going to say. Instead, he wrote an outline. Were he any good at improvising, that would have been okay. But he was just stumbling and mumbling and it made me want to scream and tear my hair out.

I'm one of those people who needs to do things myself in order to ensure that it all goes smoothly. Working in groups of two is alright usually--assuming I get along with the other person--but in big groups like this, I go crazy. Of course, there's that part of me that enjoys not having to do everything myself, but then I think "If I was working by myself, I wouldn't HAVE to tell these people that what they've just said sucks, because I'd already know and I could fix it myself!" One of the bigger problems I had, aside from Aaron's presence, was that this kid Josh (not the annoying one I usually talk about) was doing the conclusion. Our professor had told us firmly that we had to have one obvious leader. That person could do the entire speech if we all wanted, but if we all spoke then we would have to make it obvious that there was one leader moving things along. The biggest part to showing leadership would have been doing the introduction and the conclusion, which was what irritated me about having Josh do it. When I mentioned it, however, no one seemed in support of it. *grrs*

I have no idea how we did on that presentation. Rick still mumbled his introduction, Aaron got a bit carried away when explaining his horrible storyboard...It was just wretched. I'd complain about myself, except I didn't have to speak. I felt kinda stupid standing off to the side, though. And I had no dress shoes, so I had to wear my sneakers with my dark blue khakis and too-big shirt. :-

Upon getting back to my room, I discovered that, in my flustered state earlier I'd forgotten to put my keys in my schoolbag!!!!!! So I was locked out. I was going to just sit there in front of the door waiting for Kristen to get back, but then I figured I'd just go downstairs to the lobby and sit there for awhile. Ashley came out in her wheelchair and talked to me for a bit, and then finally I got a hold of Lauren and Amanda and went over to their room for a little while. I could have just bugged Becca to let me in, but I've bugged her so many times during the year that I didn't want to have to do that. However, I finally got tired of waiting and just went ahead and bugged her...and she teased me for not having come to her in the first place! X_X It is now almost 3:30 in the afternoon and Kristen is still not back, so I'm glad I decided to stop waiting for her!

I've just felt like crying all day. It doesn't help that I'm tired. And I'm SO not looking forward to this Final I have to take tonight (though at least it's the last one I have to take). With the way the rest of my day has been going, I know I'm going to fail this test.

It's funny...I've been watching everyone stressing out and losing sleep over these tests, and I just haven't been able to understand them. To me it's just another test, and I don't typically stress out over tests. Maybe it's because I'm one of those people who can easily absorb things (except math) in class, and so I feel relatively confident about my abilities. I can't even explain it; I just don't stress over tests. Even in high school, I never stressed out about Finals. All I focused on was that after those wretched things were over, I'd be free for a little while! Maybe things will change as I get tougher classes, but I really hope I'll be able to keep this laid-back attitude toward all my Finals. As much as I procrastinate, I think I've been doing pretty well at keeping on top of things so I haven't had to force myself to stay up late or anything. Actually, I'd sooner sacrifice my grade than my sleep...You would have to hold me at gunpoint to make me give THAT up, LoL! But I'm not saying that'll never happen. I'm just doing my best to make sure it doesn't.

Shoot, they just gave the weather forecast and I wasn't paying attention to it! Mom wanted me to pay attention to it because she has to come get me tomorrow and she's afraid the weather will be bad. Neither of us want to have to go home in bad weather, of course!

Speaking of things that are obvious, I got a small chuckle out of one of the presentations today. This group of snobby girls (and a guy who's too arrogant for my liking) got up, and they said that their 'campaign' was targeted toward underage Education majors (in regard to drinking). One of the girls was talking about underclassmen "who obviously are underage" or something like that. I was thinking, "Well, that's amusing," and wondering if the professor would think to say anything to them because of it. I turned to Starla and whispered, "Umm, kinda funny how she said 'obviously'...I'm an underclassman, but I'm 21!" Oh well, it was just something I felt like griping about. Today just isn't a day for me to be cheerful and full of sunshine and flowers.

Oo, flowers (these segues are amazing me)...Someone drives this olive green Volkswagon bus around campus. I don't know if it's a professor or student, but I always see it in the Parking Lot of Doom (what I call the lot I have to walk through to get to Becker). Most people call them Hippie Buses, I think. *chuckles* Anyway, Jess and I saw it again today and both said that we wanted one. I don't know what she'd do with hers, but if I had one I'd paint it either yellow or white and then decorate it with all sorts of 60's-esque flowers. It would rock. I would enjoy driving that thing back and forth from college. If it weren't for the fact that I'm nervous even handling a small car, I'd try to find myself a big hippie bus. Then I could tote not only all my stuff, but Lauren's stuff...and Lauren, too! And road trips...that would be so much fun! *sigh* Ah, to have a hippie bus...

Alright, I'm going. I need to study for this Earth Science exam. And unlike the other two Finals, which I spent less than half an hour reviewing for, I'm actually going to have to study this one because I don't know the material. *chortles* Yay, science! I do not have a scientific mind. When they start talking about plate tectonics and all that, I get this urge to start contradicting them, even though they have all the proof for their theory and I have none. It just annoys me that scientists make so many assumptions about what happened millions of years ago, just as historians like to pretend they know exactly what every historical figure said way back when. Has the time machine been invented, and I just don't know it? :-P Anyway, that's it. I just wanted to get that out. Now I'll go learn enough about this dreadful science so that I can pass the exam.

Added note: Oo! Oo! Look over there at my weather pixie! She's got a treeeee next to her! I feel so festive now! *giggles*