Today's rambling: Here's what's depressing!
Written on Wednesday, Oct. 30, 2002 at 10:46 a.m.
while feeling a bit

It snowed right up until darkness fell yesterday. Big, fat, fluffy flakes. I attempted to push all the grumbling of others aside and revel in my snow happiness, but after awhile I got sick of people whining, "I hate snow! I hate it, it's so depressing!" I just can't grasp why people find it depressing. Rain is depressing. Yes, I'm thankful for it because it gives life, but it just seems to make a cloudy day even darker. When it snows, it's as if the world brightens somewhat, because all that white stuff falling just...I dunno, it might be the bright color itself or maybe it reflects the ambient light. Either way, it makes things brighter, and that's the ONLY time I'm ever not depressed when it's cloudy. Today, for example, it's cloudy and gray, and cold misty rain is falling. That is what I call depressing. It's made the dusting of snow all slushy and gross, and ice fell from a tree onto my head as I was walking home from class.

Well okay, that part was amusing.

The only thing I found beautiful today was the view from Becker up to Givan. As I was walking, I looked up to the hill where Ralston and Givan are, and I wished desperately that I'd had a camera. All along the hill, the bluish-green pine trees were frosted with snow, yet just below the hill were deciduous trees which still had their brilliant orange and yellow leaves. It was such a strange color combination, but it was gorgeous. I think if I could have captured it properly, I would win the UAB Photo Contest.

There's one other view that, right now, is nearly breathtaking. A few feet away from the main doors into Givan, you can look out over tree-covered hills and things. There are a few houses sprinkled in there too, but the color variance of the leaves is so wonderful. I have to remember to take my camera outside with me, because I'd really love to capture that scene.

Anyway, it's too wet and miserable out there for me to go out today. :P

Josh is going to have to be told that making ignorant comments in public is going to get his ass kicked. He's a theatre major, but he's alienated everyone else in the theatre because he makes such comments as "Fags freak me out. They're disgusting." Now, many of the theatre majors are admittedly homosexual or bisexual, and I'm sure they don't take kindly to being labeled as 'fags' and 'disgusting'. I'm heterosexual, and yet I still find that offending! Y'know, I don't care if you approve of homosexuality or not. It's completely within your rights to say that it's wrong, and if you don't approve of it because of your religion, that's fine with me too. What I don't agree with, however, is ostracizing and insulting someone because they're homosexual. Christianity in particular makes a big to-do about loving one another, but I guess that only seems to count if the other people are like you. You don't have to like what that person is, but for goodness' sake, at least get to know them before you decide you don't like them! Grr...I'm not expressing this as well as I'd like to, but I just hate it when people ridicule others just because of their sexuality. If ya don't agree with it, fine. But show some common decency toward others, please!

Okay, that's enough from my soapbox. Back to Josh. In Writing class, we're reading essays about obesity and other such stuff. That essay I wrote an exerpt of really made me feel kinda proud about my body after I read it! I started feeling as though I was a softly sensuous sort of person, because I actually had curves to me instead of being a rail. I could definitely stand to lose a few pounds, but in all actuality, I'm not 'obese'. I'm normal, but in today's society, I'm not. Anyway, one of the other essays talked about this 'happy to be fat' sort of convention, and apparently there was a troupe of bellydancers (who were overweight) that performed there. In class on Monday, we had to get in groups and go over each of the essays. I wasn't in Josh's group, but I heard him, clear as day, remark "Eew, that whole bellydancing thing was gross!" Then in dance later, Lauren told me about what they had to do in class. They had to pretend they saw something they feared and they had to get away from it. Anyway, Josh told Lauren later, "I was really scared, imagining those fat people coming after me!"

WTF?? Yeah, y'know, when I see a bunch of fat people walking toward me, that just TERRIFIES me. I mean, I'd rather face a whole auditorium full of serial killers and rapists than face some fat people. Shudder.

The worst of it all is, he doesn't even know why we get angry with him when he says those things! In his mind, it's perfectly acceptable to say things like that in public. He doesn't realize he's being terribly rude. At best, someone's going to end up telling him off when he does that; at worst, he'll either be beaten within an inch of his life if the wrong person hears him, or he could even possibly be arrested. He's the sort of person who, right after a raping occurred or something, would say "Hey, didja get raped last night on the way home?" I can't even give a proper example, because it's just not in my nature to make such tasteless jokes. Did I write about how, right after a girl killed her newborn here on campus, Josh saw Lauren and I go to a mailbox right by a dumpster and asked us, "Looking for more babies?" It was disgusting, and Kevin, Lauren and I made sure to let him know. The next time he does ignorant stuff like that I'm going to tell him exactly WHY he should learn to think before he opens that mouth of his.

Anyway, I think I might go do some embroidery. I taught myself how to do the satin stitch last night. In reality, it's not that hard at all (though I'm not very good at it yet), but for years and years I'd been afraid to do anything involving satin stitch because I didn't think I'd be able to do it. My great-grandmother tried to show me when I was really young--she's the one who taught me to embroider--but I didn't get it back then. I was really pleased with myself last night when I found out I could do it. The stitch that's going to hang me up is the 'lazy daisy' stitch, I think. But I don't have to worry about that just yet. I hope I can get both pillowcases done by Christmas, since I plan on giving them to Mom! ^_^